Thank heavens for a spell chequer
By Staff
Michelle Blaylock, Mom’s Corner
Not too long ago, I was talking with one of my children who was complaining that the English language is confusing sometimes. I smiled and said, “Yes, I can understand that, but what particular part are you thinking of.” She replied with, “Well, I don’t remember what they’re called anymore, but it’s all those words that sound alike, but mean different things. It’s not so bad when you’re talking, but when you’re writing it really stinks.”
That brought back a memory of when I was substituting in second grade one time. The students were working on essays that they were to eventually read in their classroom. They were supposed to bring them to me; we would read the essays out loud together so they could “hear” if something didn’t make sense. Well, all was going fine until this one little girl brought her essay to me. She had substituted “their” for “they’re.” I was explaining that although they did sound alike the two words had totally different meanings. In her totally wonderful child logic she said, “Oh, that’s okay. I’m going to read it out loud anyway so no one will notice.” Then she paused and said, “Do I have to know what it means to say it?”
I had a hard time not laughing at that one.
However, it did make me stop and think how confusing our language really is. Just for fun I started looking up homonyms. FYI there are at least 706 pairs or groups of homonyms in the English language. As far as I can tell there are no homonyms beginning with the letter “z.” I also discovered some of them depend on where you live and how you pronounce them. For example the words “ant” and “aunt.” My mother-in-law is from Chicago she pronounces “aunt” with a “aw” sound. Where I grew up in Southeast Missouri we pronounce them the same.
Another totally confusing thing is the number of words that just one letter change makes a huge difference. Here’s a few of them: sell – cell, sew- sow, acts – ax, affect – effect, bawl – ball, be – bee, cent – sent, and cession – session.
Of course it doesn’t just stop with two words sounding the same, sometimes it has to be even more confusing and we have three or more words that are homonyms. How about “their,” “they’re,” and “there” or “bases,” “basses,” and “basis.” Try out “boar,” “bore,” “boor,” and “Boer” or “right,” “write,” “wright,” and “rite.” No wonder our children get confused learning to read and write!
Occasionally though an incorrect word can be funny. One time a student I was working with substituted “sex” for “sects.” Um, oops? Another time I was reading a newspaper and the columnist had made an oops and put in “pincher” in place of “pinscher.” That substitution left an interesting picture in my mind. I could just see this dog walking around trying to pinch people.
I’ve also discovered that computers don’t always help. Sometimes my computer will self-correct a typo. Unfortunately, it doesn’t always put in the proper word. I found this poem by Janet E. Byford that sums up the entire situation.
An Ode to the Spelling Chequer
Prays the Lord for the spelling chequer
That came with our pea sea!
Mecca mistake and it puts you rite
Its so easy to ewes, you sea.
I never used to no, was it e before eye?
(Four sometimes its eye before e.)
But now I’ve discovered the quay to success
It’s as simple as won, too, free!
Sew watt if you lose a letter or two,
The whirled won’t come two an end!
Can’t you sea? It’s as plane as the knows on yore face
S. Chequer’s my very best friend
I’ve always had trubble with letters that double
But now, as I’ve tolled you this chequer is grate
And its hi thyme you got won, like mine.
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