What would old Daniel Webster say?

By Staff
Leada Gore, Editor
Webster's Dictionary made a ginormous change this year.
"Ginormous" is one of the words being added to the dictionary this year. Apparently, dictionary writers conduct a poll each year to decide what words to add to the dictionary. Several years ago, a majority of people voted to add "ginormous" to the dictionary, apparently in an effort to avoid having to use the phrase "really, really large." The word was finally added this year.
Some of the new words are serious: IED, the initials standing for improvised explosive device such as those commonly used in Iraq; and flex-cuff, the new type of handcuffs used by many law enforcement officers. Other words are more innocuous, such as: Bollywood, a reference to the place in India where movies are made; and speed dating, a new trend of meeting, greeting and moving on.
Other words are so obscure I can't imagine anyone using them in any context, such as: chaebol, which refers to a family controlled industrial conglomerate in South Korea; and nocebo, which, in case you were wondering, Webster's defines as a "harmless substance that when taken by a patient is associated with harmful effects due to negative expectations on the psychological condition of the patient."
There are several other words, such as sudoku (a number puzzle); telenova (Hispanic soap operas); and crunk (a form of rap music.)
It's certainly not my place to judge Webster's word decisions. Still, I couldn't help but wonder if we wouldn't be better served adding some useful words as opposed to "gray literature," which apparently refers to hard-to-acquire writings.
What about "cellularitis?" That would be the condition you get when you try to drive with two hands on the wheel while still using your cell phone, thus developing a cramp in your shoulder.
Or what about "anti-strawation?" This would refer to times when you go through a fast-food drive through, order a drink and drive off, only to realize you have not been given the needed straw.
Or how about "misinternet appropriation?" This would refer to the ability to quickly click off a website dealing with celebrity gossip or an on-line game to one dealing with the news or even something really serious, like work when a boss appears.
I don't know if Webster will consider my suggestions, but I hope they do. I think they could go a long way towards making the dictionary more relevant. And if they don't like my suggestions? That's OK. It's not something I will get my chaebol in a wad about.