Attention teenage boys: consider following these rules in life
By By Michelle Blaylock, Mom’s Corner
This week is going to be Michelle’s 101 class for teenage boys, mine included. I have in recent weeks noticed many teenage males seem to need some help in this behavior department.
1. Never go to a girl’s home and honk the horn for her to come out to the vehicle. No, Not ever! If you can’t get your lazy tailend out of the vehicle, walk up to the door and meet the girl’s parents (or parent), then do the human race a favor; don’t procreate. The world does not need any more jerks in it. No, I don’t care what the weather is like. Get out of the vehicle.
2.Upon meeting her parents, do yourselves’ a favor. Look the parent in the eye, offer your hand, introduce yourself and state the purpose of your visit! Yes this can be done and although will probably feel a bit awkward the first couple of times, you will survive it and even get better at it over time.
3. If normal vision can see your underwear, your pants don’t fit. I don’t care how colorful your underwear is; I really don’t want to see it.
4. Groping your girlfriend in a hallway, at a football game, the movies, or in a store is not romantic, sexy, or attractive. All it does is show a disturbing lack of respect for the girl (or for girls – disrespect towards the guy!) Don’t tell me I “don’t understand.” How do you think I got at least three of my seven kids? (Oh, we currently have one of my daughter’s friends living with us. We lovingly call her “ours.”)
5. Adults are not impressed by your use of curse words. If you really want to impress an adult, try expanding your vocabulary to include words with more than four letters. Here, let me help. Start with these and try working your way up: nefarious, abscond, and petulant.
6. No, you are not fooling her parents. They were young once too. Your generation hasn’t come up with anything that new.
7. If you reek of the hottest new Axe or similar scent, you better think twice about ringing the doorbell. If I can stand three feet away and smell stale cigarette smoke, stale alcohol, and/or stale sweat on you then you seriously need to consider bathing before the date. Oh and dump the smokes and the alcohol if you want to take my daughter out.
8. Now let’s talk about the vehicle you drive. If you show up riding on some crouch rocket, after my husband gets done drooling over it, don’t be surprised if you are invited in for a cozy family evening. I’m not completely against motorbikes. However, I would not willingly allow my daughter to ride on one without knowing the driver. Are you driving a hotrod? Who pays for it? Honestly, I would rather my daughter date someone who knows how to work for what they want and need than a boy who gets everything handed to them.
9. Boys, if you consistently avoid family time and if you consistently get aggravated by young siblings then you need to consider what your goals are in life. Avoiding the girl’s family like the plague does not endear you to them, and in any case makes it much more difficult for you to date the girl.
Avoiding the family makes you look like a jerk.
10. Finally, if you have to tell me you are a “full grown” man, then, you are not a grown man! “Grown” men can be recognized by the way they show respect for others. Just because you can have sexual intercourse does not make you a man. Most animals do that! I had a Chihuahua that can have sexual intercourse and I don’t think you would consider it a grown man! Try again!!
I have a feeling over the next few weeks I will get suggestions to add to these, but these 10 are good basis to start with. Never fear girls, I’m sure I have a Michelle’s 101 hiding for you, too!
